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Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Feeling Better

I'm feeling mostly better now. I'm probably going to resume working on Monday. Luckily, I didn't lose my job due to my hospitalization. I feel well enough to go back to work. I was able to figure my taxes/tribute!

My parents are still supporting my decision to be drug-free. They're noticing that I'm recovering. It appears that my new psychiatrist won't be able to forcibly drug me.

I figure I'd rather risk relapse, rather than be doped up and unable to do anything at all. Unfortunately, psychiatrists don't understand that.

I feel much better than before. I feel like I cracked another layer of my pro-State brainwashing.

I'm going to start putting together my queued drafts again soon.


dionysusal said...


Chrono said...

I used to have temper tantrums when I was a kid. I'd have them during school and stop class for 20+ minutes during the worst ones. If I acted this way as an adult, I'd be restrained and forcibly drugged. But any inclination to act this way as an adult is automatically met with feelings of shame and guilt. I'd be embarrassed to throw a tantrum about anything. What are your panic attacks like? And what is your experience of them? Are you ever mad at yourself for having panic attacks?

FSK said...

I certainly don't have them on purpose. It's a sense of overwhelming fear.

It's gradually wearing off. It seems that it's part of the process of cracking your pro-State brainwashing.

dionysusal said...

When I was cracking my pro-State brainwashing, it manifested as extreme anger instead of panic attacks. Anger at being lied to. Anger at being kept ignorant. Anger at the vast majority of people who actually embrace their own enslavement. I eventually got over it (mostly), but not without damage being done. I alienated myself from my family (parents/siblings) and my wife, who no longer wants anything to do with me. She’s still mostly enslaved. And my work has suffered. Still, if I had it to do all over again, even knowing
what the consequences would be, I wouldn’t change a thing. At least I’m trying to live authentically and not being a cowardly herd member. We must pay the price and not count the cost, FSK.

Anonymous said...

With employment law in the United Kingdom, your employer would have harassed you into leaving your job on the grounds that the cost of a lawsuit against construtive dismissial is less than the cost of you returning to work and getting ill again and them having to fire you while sick.

This does actually happen.

Master Doh-San said...

Just remember: there's a reason they call it "practicing" medicine.

Anonymous said...

In the UK, a bad situation is caused by the way Industrial Tribunals award damages. In fact having regulations makes the employment situation far worse than having no employment law at all.

A man got physically injured at work due to the company's negligence. He went to his government funded Doctor who instead of totally signing him off work, just said he could no longer work in his specialty. So he got sent back to work with a note saying he can't work. Effectively he was at work, but not able to do any work.

The company didn't really want to pay someone to sit and do nothing.

So what is a sensible company to do?

Well it seems you will get a big fine (if it comes to court) if you fire someone for being sick.

BUT if you bully and harass them until they finally give up and resign, then the industrial tribunal payment will be far less.

So it makes economic sense if a company injures someone to bully them until they are forced to leave the company.

Heavens, if the man got further injured at work then the company could have been in big trouble.

I do wonder if solicitors actually offer this out to companies as paid advice!

So the effect of employment law is to make the situation worse.

If there was no law at all it would be better.

With no law, the company would just fire the guy.

With UK employment law, the company bullies and harasses the injured worker until he leaves.

Well done!

The law is not backed by morality.

A man gets injured at work. The only people to benefit are the solicitors who GET PAID TO ADVISE COMPANIES TO BULLY PEOPLE UNTIL THEY ARE FORCED TO LEAVE.

Most UK politicians have never had a normal job in their life. They have either worked in government, for universities, in PR companies, for political parties, in law etc.

They just do not know what it is like to be a normal person working for a crappy company that craps on its workers if it can make a short-term buck out of it.

Trufu said...

You may also want to look at "The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook," Fourth Edition by Edmund Bourne ( ) It's quite comprehensive and practical. They may also have the book at the library.

FSK said...

I'm a contractor/consultant so they can fire me at any time for no cost.

Anyway, they want me back and I return to work on Monday. I'm feeling well enough to work. I should start blogging again soon.

dionysusal said...

I hope you get well soon, FSK. We need you to give the straight poop on this Goldman Sachs business. Hopefully this causes them to nibble the dust-- the dirty crooks.

sid said...

Speaking about anger, how do you deal with that, FSK?
Many people are trained to repress their anger, to distance themselves from it. The anger doesn't disapear but it's no longer your anger. However at times you can still feel it: 'someone is angry but i don't know who'.
This can cause nightmares of angry monsters and panic attacks.
Sounds too simple to be true, right?

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